Theater of the Soul

I know I’m about 3 seasons behind in declaring my adoration for 24 and the god-like qualities of Jack Bauer, but I got a good chuckle from this.  My favorite random facts about Jack Bauer?

• If you wake up in the morning, it’s because Jack Bauer spared your life.
• 1.6 billion Chinese are angry with Jack Bauer. Sounds like a fair fight.
• If Jack says “I just want to talk to him/her” and that him/her is you… well amigo, you’re fucked.
• If you are still conscious, it is because Jack Bauer doesn’t want to carry you.
• Jack Bauer’s gun is actually a water pistol, but the water shoots out in the form of bullets. Why? Because the gun is being held by Jack fucking Bauer.
• When life gave Jack Bauer lemons, he used them to kill terrorists. Jack Bauer fucking hates lemonade.