Theater of the Soul

Aaaaaar! Captain Jack Sparrow be no Jack Bauer…

But he’ll do in a pinch.

I took t’ sprogs t’ see Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man’s Chest last night. I had read a few o’ t’ early reviews and people seemed t’ be split starboard down t’ middle. Some felt it was ‘too long’ and ‘t’ movie (and Johnny Depp) tried too hard’, while others had nothin’ but good thin’s t’ say. I gotta tell ya though: this be a Disney flick…not somethin’ I’m goin’ t’ take seriously anyways.

I rarely go t’ t’ movies at all t’ begin with. In t’ last 10 years, I’ve seen only 9 movies in t’ theater because I hate t’ whole experience now. Outrageous ticket prices, outrageous food prices and obnoxious sprogs have all conspired t’ turn me completely off. Even when thar be a movie that I want t’ see when it first hits theaters, I still DREAD t’ experience. I had to pillage and plunder close t’ 50 doubloons last night when all was said and done, but it was SO worth it.

Johnny Depp was amazin’, as usual. There be few actors that can make me forget that they’re actin’ but he be one o’ them. I made it a point not t’ read any spoilers for this movie and it was worth t’ wait. Although t’ movie be nothin’ more than a mindless good time from beginnin’ t’ end, t’ emotional surprises still had a good punch t’ them. Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley be still lusty wenches, too pretty for their own good, but both gave solid performances.

Git yourselves t’ a theater, smartly, lads and lassies!

(P.S.: Yaaaaar! I do expect t’ be speakin’ like this’ for days. Landlubbers!)