I awoke this morning at 4am, bleary eyed and desperately in need of coffee. I stayed up to watch the Emmys last night (GO KEIFER!), then tossed and turned until around 1am. Unfortunately, I know that today, I will need to be at the top of my game, and that means I need coffee more than I need sleep at this point. I want to leave myself enough time to have a little bit of peace and quiet this morning without rushing Monkeyboy out the door for the first day of school.
I sat down with my first cup of coffee, opened up my email program…and was stunned to find several incredibly touching offers of donations to help with the pseudo-nephews. I can’t even express to you guys how grateful I am for the gestures…really I am. I simply don’t have the words…
But I can’t tell you how wierd I’d feel taking money for something like this…or anything for that matter. Catfish and I had occasion to have this very same discussion on the phone a few days ago and I guess it’s just a pride thing or something with me, but I’d feel very strange taking money from people for any reason. In a financial sense, I live by a very simple rule: if you can’t afford it, you don’t get it. If I couldn’t find a way to afford taking on two more mouths to feed, I simply wouldn’t do it. I make ‘enough’ money, but as we probably all know, one can probably never have TOO MUCH money. Fortunately, I live simply and can squeeze a penny til ole Abe is screaming for mercy.
Financially, I CAN do this. Emotionally remains to be seen.
However, a lovely woman has suggested an Amazon wishlist as a compromise. No money changes hands and people would know exactly what their money is used for. That makes me a little more comfortable and I may do that if I decide to bring these children home. I have no intention of making any decisions until sometime later this week…I will be too emotionally drained for a day or two to form any kind of rational thought I’m sure.
Anyways, I am about ready to dash out the door but I wanted to thank all of you for the offers of donations and the words of encouragement. You’ve all touched this jaded old heart of mine in ways you simply can’t imagine.
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